This is a “just for me” kind of post… I just want to write about memories that remind me of the love and joy I have been so blessed to find in my life.

These are a few good memories - just a random snapshot of the things that come to mind when I find a good feeling inside and float back through time when I felt these kinds of things…

The Concrete Blonde concert - it was the early 90s. I felt great. Life seemed completely open to me. I was with my best friends, and the music was awesome. It was the first time I heard Smashing Pumpkins - they were passing out promo music… little did I dream I would be moving to Chicago someday!

The mountain in Vermont - It was the mid eighties… but the memories are timeless. I have never before or since felt such a palpable sensation of the life around me. I arrived in early summer, and it just seemed you could feel the growth of the mountain trees and plants - feel it deep inside your chest. The air was thick and rich. The nights were peaceful. The people I met that summer in Vermont hold a special place in my heart to this day.

I have fond memories of writing letters to my friends back in Ohio. I was blown away on a recent visit back to my hometown when a good friend of mine handed me letters I had written from way back then!

Many stories come from that summer - including the overly friendly raccoon that befriended me at my night job at the lumber yard, the night we visited my roommate’s father’s place of business - the funeral home - in the middle of the night, and the Jehovah’s witnesses that took me in towards the end of the summer and gave me a painting job. Too bad we never really got around to painting much!

Six Flags in September of 2001 - I have this fantastic memory of visiting Six Flags with my happy little family just before 9/11… I was happily married at that time, and my wife was carrying our daughter… and our son was six years old… it was September, sunny, and everything seemed absolutely perfect. I felt proud, strong, happy, safe, and so satisfied with life. Almost feels like a postcard in my mind!

My last Thanksgiving with my mom - my mother loved the holidays… and Thanksgiving was always a special one for our family. My mother passed away this last December. I miss her terribly. Even though she was already very sick last Thanksgiving, I remember seeing the pride in her eyes as she looked around the table at her children and grandchildren with so much love. The food was prepared by the kids - but under her direction and using her dishes - so it felt like old times to me! I found myself facing so much loss on a day that was meant for giving Thanks - and felt blessed that I was able to be with my mother on that day.

I am so grateful for the people I have known, the places I have lived, and for all of the gifts of love and support I have received in my life.

There are things in my past that I find myself missing profoundly at times… but I just have to remind myself how important it is to let go in order to make way for new experiences and new life.

And what better time of year to contemplate the gifts of death and of renewal? New life comes from the death and letting go of old life. Nothing lasts forever.

Joy in life comes from Presence - being present in the moment… Life is Now.